As usual, in the hour pre-dawn,

The light in d trump’s hair went on

And, while his staff was still in bed,

The voice spoke up in d trump’s head.


“Good morning, donny! How my boy?

Is spring with you? Do you enjoy

Much blossom on your cherry trees?

Or maybe blossom make you sneeze?


Good news for you—we thinking now

You got big problems—we know how

To solve and we already do it

Quicker than you say Scott Pruitt!


First, with FSB chief meanie,

We substitute for Spicer weanie—

If media people make a scene,

He shoot them all, live and on-screen.


For Kellyanne, we have new way

To silence critic: is death ray.

So, CNN will not behave?

Is hidden in their microwave!


That smirky guy—what name? Oh—ryan—

Who failed health care with clumsy lyin’?

We tell truth—polonium sent him where

He need asbestos–not health care!


Likewise, big loser, mikey flynn?

Who try to cut your room to spin?

He find an end—a little retro:

One push—oops!—under DC metro.


And Clouseau fellow—stupid nunes

Is deep beneath South Lawn petunias

While we spread really nasty rumor

That Hil have big affair with Schumer.


And last, not least, we have real facts

And photos that refute attacks

That crowd that watched on DC mall

Was less than millions— wait!—not all!


We have, as well—you through your roof

With this—bus tickets to show proof

That Clinton woman who you hate

Had voters moved from state to state


So that, when truth be known, those who

Had voted for her—only two!

And rest of country—this is true—

A hundred million—went for you!


But, have to talk to Petry, then

Have coffee with Marine le Pen,

Then secret meeting with Farage

In inner London bus garage


Before I see what I can do

To ruin NATO and EU—

Is big job when you have to rule

Whole world—oh, by way—April Fool!”


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