Alone in his bathroom, leaning over his sink,

D trump faced his mirror (stand-in for a shrink)

And cried, “There it is! Someone take it away!

It’s so large and menacing, baggy and grey!”

The mirror replied, “Here I am, on the job.

I heard all that shrieking. Okay: what’s the prob?

Obama? The media? that stupid red hat?

Is it Schumer? Colbert?   Alec Baldwin? What’s that?”

Trump lost that strange tan and his jowls gave a shake.

“Oh, sorry! I must have dialed you by mistake!

It’s just so addicting—my lovely i-phone!

But you can leave now—I’m okay—and alone.”

The mirror looked doubtful. “There wasn’t a tweet.

You screamed—and I heard a great clumping of feet.

There’s something real strange going on in trump tower

And I think that it starts with—that thing in the shower!”

“Don’t look—no! It’s nothing! Don’t look over there!”

D trump begged and waved tiny hands in the air.

“I’m sorry I mentioned it—back to Snow White!

There’s nothing! No, nothing! Just shadows! Good night!”

The mirror stared hard. “Though I always believe

The things which you say, I’m not going to leave

Till you tell me what’s lurking beneath that TRUMP towel.”

Trump fell to the floor with a terrible howl!

“Now it’s moved to the toilet—and it’s having a pee.”

“It’s not there! It’s not there! There is nothing to see!”

Trump moaned as he crouched on the carpet beneath.

“Now it’s squirting out paste—and it’s brushing its teeth—

Or—wait—am I smelling—wait—Essence of Musk?

Not teeth,” said the mirror. “I should have said tusk!

What is a man doing, who says he hates germs,

Devoting his bathroom to loose pachyderms?”

Trump groped his way upwards. “Please, mirror, I swear—

This bathroom is empty–again, nothing’s there!”

The mirror said, doubtfully, shaking its head,

“Then what’s in that bathrobe now heading for bed?”

D trump hung his head, as if facing his doom.

“Okay. I confess. There’s a thing in the room

Which we never must mention, whatever the cost.

You give it a name, and, like that, we are lost!”

The lightbulb now flickered behind mirror’s eyes—

“Oh! That! Well, it’s that? Then it’s no great surprise

That you’d want to deny and deflect every probe–

But—a word to the wise? Snip “V.P.” from that robe!”