Area 52

For all of you X-filers, those who believe

In extraterrestrials, those who receive

Their e-mail from space—just what can it mean?

That mysterious massacre at Bowling Green.

 

The nineteenth of no-time, as none will aver,

The event didn’t happen which didn’t occur

At no place, as no one can ever deny,

Where no one was shot and so no one could die.

 

No person from Syria, none from Iraq,

Was heavily armed for that deadly attack.

No person from Yemen on any watch list,

Took part in a murder which didn’t exist,

 

But Kellyanne told us—unless she misspoke,

‘Cause she doesn’t lie—she’s just regular folk

Who helped donald trump win the popular vote,

And spent all her savings on one modest coat

 

Which she wore on that terrible day when her boss

Saw the whole US present, unaware of the loss

Of the millions and millions he just knew that he faced,

Till the photographs showed that they’d all been erased!

 

And it happened again—all believers take note–

When five million illegals made off with the vote

Which the people gave donald—Kellyanne must have said

It was true—‘cause she’d never make up things instead!

 

And yet—they were gone! Though d trump will resist

The idea that maybe they didn’t exist—

After all, he can trust her—almost more than a man—

But there is something odd about that Kellyanne.

 

Perhaps she is magic—it’s certainly queer,

That things which she says somehow all disappear.

We doubt it’s the media—though they can lie—

They are mean and would claim that a person could die,

 

Or a thousand (we’re nothing but killers—so SAD

And not at all better than d trump’s bro, Vlad),

Then make them all vanish so that they could say

It was all just a hoax and then blame Kelly-A.

 

But, in any event, we should count ourselves lucky

That we live so far off from the wilds of Kentucky,

Or else we’d be gone, never more to be seen,

In the disappeared massacre at Bowling Green!

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