Nothing Human

“Guided by Pioneer 10, it was simple

To conquer your planet. You’re no more than a pimple

To us,” said the aliens, flashing a grin.

“You opened the door and we simply walked in.”

They came, saw, and conquered each people and nation,

Then quickly created an administration,

But first things were first when they came from the sky,

A big sign that read: “Humans need not apply!”

 

“Humans need not apply!

That’s the refrain of our song.

Though we’re from a star,

We know that you are

Incapable of getting along,

So, humans, it’s no use to try.

Humans need not apply!

 

“In each generation, there’s always disaster.

Some over-ambitious one lusts to be master,

Then murders the others—the ones who had picked him

To rule—until he is the very next victim.

You look at each other and all that you’re seeing

Is color and features and not fellow being

And then you think gender should be the whole base

Of value—and therefore discard half the race!

 

Humans need not apply!

We have no work for you

Unless the solution

To ruling’s pollution,

Then, certainly, we’ll call on you.

Cause the whole planet to die?

Then, humans, you have to apply!

 

And then there’s religion—instead of it filling

A spiritual need, you just use it for killing.

Whoever believes just like you forms your class,

But everyone else must be murdered en masse.

So when we can see that your sole qualification’s

A talent for killing and discrimination,

We’ll say thanks, but no thanks: you’ve long been on trial

And lost, so you’ve left us no choice but denial.

 

Humans need not apply!

It’s your fault, since you began it.

There’s no use in debating—

You’re hell-bent on hating

And making that hell of your planet.

So what else could we reply, but:

Humans need not apply?”

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