Talking Dead

There’s been a strange disease

Through certain sections of our land.

It’s not the plague or Zika—

Those we all can understand.

Instead it causes people

Often relatively bright

To lose all grip on common sense

While firmly spinning right.


Is it caused by a frightening virus?

Or hovering alien ships?

Is there nothing at all we can do to ward off

The terrible Trumpalypse?


You see them at conventions,

Their eyes and faces blank.

They swear allegiance to a man

Who they claim’s always frank,

Unchanging in his thinking,

Although it’s plain to see

In contrast to their leader

Hillary’s stability.


Is it spread through drinking bad water?

Or perhaps Windows 10’s microchips?

Is there nothing that science can do to erase

The terrible Trumpalypse?

They’re all for building walls

And anti-immigrant stuff

And lots more tax breaks for the rich

Who never have enough.

They say they hate “big government”

Which says their minds are numb

Since it’s that very government

Their Medicaid comes from.


Does it spring from toking constantly

Or long-ago acid trips?

What could we find to drive away

The terrible Trumpalypse?


You’ll know you’ve caught it too,

This terrible disorder

When you feel that you would like to ship

All Latins cross the border.

You’ll randomly abuse

The pope and other guys

And half of all the human race

And never apologize.


When it reaches that final condition,

The cup will not pass from your lips.

You can only hope for a cabinet post in

The terrible Trumpalypse!


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