Vlad’s Quite the Lad

Putin sat in the Kremlin, pleased.

“We put Trump in office, tension eased

And we not watched, whatever we do!

Let’s steal Lithuania and Latvia, too,

And so no Baltic state is missed,

Let’s add Estonia to shopping list

And since US will not restrain

Us, let’s occupy last bit of Ukraine.

 

Genius, Donald, genius,

That’s what he think I said.

What he not know is, actual word,

Means “sucker” in Russian, instead!

 

He have big hands, this US dude

(I think that what he said—

But maybe translation not correct—

He certainly have big head!)

We not need hack his e-mail,

Or send our spies to stalk:

Whatever come into his head

Come right out in his talk!

 

Genius, Don is genius?

Not stupid, easy to see:

So much of what he say each day

Sound pretty much like me!

 

We help him win—then him our friend

And NATO fall apart.

EU is next, then we erase

Our signature from START.

Perhaps some day, we visit him

(for present: big hair comb)

‘cause when he win, US will feel

Increasingly like home.”

 

Genius, who is genius?

Well, when this election done,

He think he man with big, big brain,

But we know who’s got one!”

 

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